Pitfalls of online dating: what to be wary of. Dangerous online dating Internet dating and its consequences

Lovers - RUDN University student Margarita Pogozheva from Moscow and Santiago Gutierrez from Venezuela - are walking in Novopushkinsky Square

PHOTO: Anna Ivantsova

The opinion of the browser "VM" Nikita Mironov

Women are so sorry

Do you want to be scared of women? Welcome to dating sites! Even scrolling through the first hundred photos, any normal man will experience nausea. Roughly photoshopped beauties with forced smiles, pewter eyes and duck lips look like flies. And they also cause infernal longing. Most of the inhabitants of dating sites are not girls. These are chicks. Something between a cow and a man, closer to a cow. The first experience of communication confirms the guess.

“Che. Pashli. Sorry. Oktyabyrskaya metro station. And all without punctuation, with a small letter. How did these abortion victims come online? And it’s very simple: they are not able to find a man live and “for a relationship”. Men run from them.

Real acquaintance is good because you immediately understand - beautiful girl or not, smart or dumb, has a sense of humor or an ensign at heart. The Internet, as a rule, does not immediately give an idea. Appearance, sure. I feel wildly sorry for normal women who are looking for “something serious” on the Internet. For men go here as to a public toilet - to cope with a physiological need. There is nothing more to do here.

The opinion of the observer "VM" Irina Orekhova

Virtual Temptation

Internet dating is an absolute evil. Around me, many couples divorced precisely because of such virtual contacts. Moreover, 99 percent did not reach real meetings. But the divorce was very real, with the courts.

Divorced not so much because of jealousy or from Great love to another. No one screams, wringing their hands theatrically: “I don’t love you, husband, I love Kolya from the Internet!” The reason, it seems, is that the “half” hanging on dating sites spends so much time, effort and feelings on it that there is no longer enough for their own family.

You see, this is his choice, - my friend Lena explains to me in the kitchen over a cup of strong tea. She just got out of court, filed for divorce. Two kids, mortgage. - I can handle.

The husband spends all his strength on these Kat and Ol, he doesn’t get out of the chats, he doesn’t get enough sleep.

Another will say that a family man has nothing to do on such sites, and once he got useful, it means that something does not suit him at home.

We are all human,” Lena shrugs. - Now they have forgotten such a word - “temptation”, but this is it. For example, you know that stealing is not good. Suddenly in front of you is a hillock of money, absolutely no one's. I took them - and a lot of money. You may not work. Here, will you take it? It's easier.

Agree. Simpler. But I am sure that temptations can and should be fought.

The opinion of the observer "VM" Anna Moskovkina

Got bored

Dating on the network is unlikely to bypass anyone. They didn't get past me. I won’t say that I tried to find my destiny there or start any serious relationship - and I don’t believe at all that idle chatter in the chat can result in something significant.

Although they say that there are examples.

I registered in these networks solely in order to understand who is sitting there, what they are looking for, what people are thinking about. Well, have fun, of course.

The first thing I immediately noticed was the girls in draft poses. You don’t even need to open a questionnaire - and it’s clear that they are mainly looking for commodity-money relations on these sites. But the guys are different - from those who are ready to continue communication under the auspices of "in the morning - money, in the evening - chairs", to discuss these very commodity-money relations, to those who are serious. By the way, the latter believe everything and unconditionally. For example, 41-year-old Konstantin from Moscow was the first to write to me. I introduced myself to him as a teacher of Russian language and literature in one of the metropolitan schools located in the area of ​​Chistye Prudy. The counterpart tried to show knowledge of my subject, but he did not see the difference between Brodsky and Yesenin, and he did not hear about Alexander Blok at all. I had to keep my reputation and give a short lecture on Russian literature.

Ten minutes later, such communication was pretty tired. She said it's time for me to check test papers, and left the network forever. Because it got boring.

Opinion of family psychologist Irina Nikitina

Exit for the shy

The Internet literally saves many people from loneliness. After all, how does a huge number of Muscovites live? House - subway - work. And sleep on the weekends. And when would you like to meet? And where? At work? But many work in same-sex groups. Here sits a young beautiful and clever woman in the school library. Or in accounting. Whom does she meet? And the Internet still allows you to find your beloved man.

Another question is that you need to immediately understand why you are dating, and find out what, in fact, a man is looking for on dating sites. After all, it often happens that interests do not coincide.

A woman, for example, wants to have a permanent relationship, a family, and a man just wants to “walk around”. As a rule, this most important moment - the purpose of acquaintance - can be clarified even during correspondence. And then decide whether to continue the acquaintance "in real life" or not.

Let's not forget that there are many shy people in the world. They can be smart, cute, talented, but also shy. When a guy walks up to such a girl on the street, she may simply be confused, although she liked him, and the acquaintance will not take place. Or maybe the young man has a psychological barrier - well, he doesn’t know how to approach girls, start a conversation, introduce himself and ask for a phone number.

Some people can, and some don't. And there are a lot of people who can't. In fact, the method of acquaintance - on the Internet or not - is completely unimportant. This is purely technical. What matters is how the relationship develops.

People lose each other not because they met online, but because they could not overcome the crises that inevitably arise in a relationship. But that's another story.

The opinion of the sexologist Alexander Poleev

Solid swindle

The main problem with online dating is that there are more opportunities for deception. Women, for example, are very fond of putting their best photos five, ten years ago. And when a man comes on a date, he often feels a little dumbfounded - the nymph turned out to be completely different. At the same time, it often happens that a woman does not come on a date at all.

There are a huge number of "virtual girls" on the Internet who have been sitting there for years to pluck the flowers of male attention. When a man invites such a girl on a date, she is very busy, then she went to her sick mother. An experienced person will figure out such a liar very quickly, and young men can fall in love and really suffer.

As for the men themselves, then, I assure you, on the Internet, the vast majority of them, unlike women, are looking for short-term relationships. Their goal is one-time or multiple sex. Sometimes it gets ridiculous. A man and a woman agree that they meet at his or her house, and then they go to the cinema. But after sex, the man looks at the smartphone screen, says that something terrible has happened, that he needs to go, and after that he no longer appears. They didn't even go to the movies together.

Although, of course, I would not demonize online dating. Everything depends on the people. There are those who, as a result of them, find their love and destiny. But as far as I know, they are still a minority.

May 5, 2018, at 19:46

Children are the most active group of Internet users. Online dating is especially dangerous for teenagers. This is due to their age feature- an inexhaustible need for communication, both with peers and with older people.


The Internet provides teenagers with limitless opportunities for communication, eliminating complexes associated with appearance. The ability to communicate without seeing each other is only an apparent advantage. In fact, it allows an army of Internet scammers to ingratiate themselves with less experienced users and pull off their fraudulent schemes.


Common types of Internet scammers and their algorithm


Almost all of them operate standard scheme: they start a relaxed or even frank communication that can inspire trust and interest in continuing to get to know each other. After some time, based on their own sympathy, the scammers try to persuade the victim to do something. And indeed, quite often they succeed. Otherwise, their “business” would have burned out long ago.


Statistics say that especially the stronger sex falls into the trap. But representatives of the beautiful half of humanity should not relax. If scammers most often try to get direct material gain from adult Internet users, then it is easier to get confidential information from teenagers, get them hooked on drugs, etc. And this ultimately leads to illegal enrichment.


Quite often, with the help of dating on the Internet, girls and boys who have not taken place in their personal lives try to assert themselves at the expense of the younger, and therefore less critical generation. The situation should be alert when a seventeen-year-old guy, after a day of dating on a social network, invites a thirteen-year-old girl to meet. His age needs are completely incompatible with teenage female needs, and a gullible girl can believe in fairy tales “we just talk, are we friends?!”.


One of the most dangerous communication partners in the social network is the "hunter for children." Its purpose is to use them in the porn industry or other illegal activities. In order not to fall for the bait of such "friends" by correspondence, you should get to know them, so to speak, theoretically. The following list of the most common unwanted Internet acquaintances can help with this.


Unwanted types of internet acquaintances


Sexually preoccupied types have already been mentioned above. But there are also individuals who do not bring much physical harm. Because they are very far away. But the moral corruption of the rather fragile psyche of a teenager, they may well provoke. This can be expressed in the verbal description of sexual scenes, including in a perverted form. In sending intimate photos and requests to send nude photos of yourself.


The second type is the most dangerous. Mentally abnormal people do not always show their features from the first lines. Later, such types can arrange scenes of jealousy, threaten, and, in general, behave inappropriately. Therefore, the main recipe that guarantees the absence of problems due to such acquaintances is not to give either a phone number or an address to those with whom you do not know well. A well-known person can be considered a person with whom he has been in close contact for at least a month and has seen at least on Skype.


Another type is the elderly "boys and girls" who were hit "by the demon in the ribs." The age difference does not scare them at all, and at first they can hide their years.


Some teenage girls who have grown up early may fall for the bait of a sex tourist if they publish or send in letters personal candid photos.


"Comfreys" or writers of a fine nature do not do much harm, except for the loss a large number time. Their acquaintance on the Internet consists in the exchange of a long and confusing correspondence. They find the main pleasure in the correspondence itself.


The deceivers and suspicious types also include those people who on the Internet present themselves as not who they really are. Most often, there are "models", successful "businessmen" and just "favorites of the opposite sex." In fact, these are gray mice who want to dream. Alas, more dangerous types of scammers, such as scammers, can be hidden behind their photographs.


An internet mobster, or scammer, is a scammer who cheats for money. By any means. From asking to borrow money for a visa to replenishing a mobile account with a small amount. Since such criminals often organize themselves into groups, they can be retrained from individualist swindlers into a mafia network. There can be many schemes. And a request to receive a transfer for huge interest, and a question about a credit card number, as if by the way. And a plea for the salvation of a loved one for a considerable amount of cash. The main recipe is not to send money to anyone and not to sell your property under any circumstances.


Dating recidivist. This is a generally harmless type who is simply in an eternal search for friends, an ideal partner, a soulmate, and acquaintances. Fortunately, for a long time he will not communicate with the author of one account, so the harm from him will be in the loss of time and the collapse of hopes for further communication.


Output


In conclusion, the conclusion suggests itself that online dating and teenagers are a rather unexplored topic. This means that the main guarantee of the safety of children of adolescence who hang out in social networks is a trusting relationship with loved ones. When a child shares everything that worries him with his parents, even in adolescence, then the older generation, wise by experience, has the opportunity to warn him and protect him from most dangers, and not only on the Internet.

They met through the Internet. Each relationship ended in a new mutual ecstasy. For everyone, these meetings were like an energy charge.

Every day they met in the virtual world, maintaining anonymity. It didn't matter to them who they really were.

“You are my sweet,” she wrote.
"You are my marmalade."
She laughed, "My son used to call me that."
"Mother???"
"David???"

We often hear that only losers or perverts go to dating sites, that online dating is not only ineffective, but can also be dangerous. Say, it's better to go to a bar or a disco to meet someone. Let's try to figure out which of these myths are true, and what undesirable consequences are possible if you approach online dating too lightly.

Dating is for losers (low self-esteem)

Is it true that you can only meet programmers or complete losers on the Internet?

Are there only prostitutes and sex-obsessed young people on dating sites?

First, there are no more of them on dating sites than on the street, in a park or in a bar. And secondly, you yourself choose both the dating site and the purpose of dating. And it is much easier for you to find a person according to the criteria set in the search on a dating site than on the street. Of course, you are not immune from the fact that they will not write you a letter with an offer of intimacy, but note that you are deprived of any physical harassment, being at different monitors. You can simply delete the email and forget about it in a second.

Why do I need the help of dating sites if I am constantly in contact with new people in real life?

Yes... and how many of them are those with whom you would like to live life together? And why are you single now?

Online dating is a complete scam.

Are you saying that you wrote a letter to someone, but he did not answer you? Or maybe he has already met his soul mate, but just forgot to delete the profile? Do not despair, write to another person, to a third... And, perhaps, you will meet your Love with a capital letter.

Acquaintance through dating sites is a long, and expensive...

In the two days that have passed since you signed up on a dating site, have you met your soul mate? And no one said that with the help of a dating site you can quickly find your love, this is just one of the ways of dating, and quite effective. Or are you for Last year loneliness, before you put your profile on a dating site, can you boast of the best results? Yes? And why do you still fall asleep in splendid isolation? In addition, the Internet has become more accessible for many - both at work and at home there is access to the Web.

Types of dating site users. How to recognize potential danger?

Pick-ups.

In search of virtual sex on the Internet, there are pick-up artists, men who are looking for dating for the purpose of seduction. Pick-up artists are sure that seduction is a skill that can be developed through constant training. Their main goal is sex, real or virtual, now it is not so important anymore - the main thing is to convince a woman in record time that he is the best and the only one.

The main goal of the Internet pick-up artist is to collect as many girls as possible in his collection and put a tick in front of their names - virtual sex has taken place.

As a rule, such a girl or a young man communicates on a dating site and meets in real life not with one, but with several partners at once.

How to calculate this kind of deception? Try registering a few more accounts and start chatting with the person you suspect of being dishonest. By the way, keep in mind that Internet Casanovas very often “write” typical letters to girls. It is easy to recognize such letters - they do not contain any specific information about the fair sex (there is no name, no word about hobbies and individual traits).

Pikaper's special features:

1. Sense of humor and attractive appearance

2. Pleasant in every way

3. Quick, unusual acquaintance

4. Special perseverance

5. Talk about sex, and only about it.

6. Desire to get a phone number by all means

7. After the first victory disappears for a few days

8. Keep everything under control

9. First to make a date

10. He himself chooses a place for a meeting, without discussing or making compromises.

Trolls (jokers)

A favorite habitat of trolls is dating chats. People come there not only to get acquainted, but also for simple communication on topics of interest to them. The contentious, emotional discussions unfolding on dating chats are the perfect place for a troll to operate.

Troll - "hero-lover"

Gets the thrill of consistently flirting and intriguing online with women. This incites social competition among women who once thought that affectionate names, poems, declarations of love were dedicated exclusively to them. Also, often the naive reaction of women to his actions provokes men to follow his manner and compete in winning female attention, which ultimately leads to the fact that the predominant part of the group concentrates on flirting, and the group ceases to fulfill its main goal.

Trolls - imitators

This deception appears as follows: a not-too-attractive girl finds a photo of a written beauty on the net and puts it instead of her own. As a result, men, communicating with a girl, represent her completely different from what she really is. The apogee of deceit is the first real meeting, to which a girl can come and confess, or maybe simply not appear. How to uncover such a deception? Theoretically, this can be done, of course. So, for example, you can ask a girl to take a picture against the backdrop of a fresh issue of a certain newspaper or your own page on the network. In practice, in the very first letter, a request for this kind of photograph will sound somewhat strange, keep in mind.

scammers

Usually, girls resort to this type of deception, who, after several weeks (months) of communication, begin to ask a man for money for things, trips, solving problems that have suddenly arisen, and so on. At the same time, the representatives of the stronger sex are so fascinated by the ladies that they simply cannot refuse to sponsor them. What is the secret to the success of this deception? The fact is that both during the acquaintance itself (up to the specifics of the photographs, as well as the data in the questionnaire) and during the subsequent correspondence, scammers and scammers (men also very often try on the role of a seductive lady) use some psychological techniques that are very effective act on men. How to avoid this type of "online dating" scam? First of all, we can advise you to be vigilant. Remember that your money is only your money and people who accuse you of stinginess cannot feel any good feelings towards you. In addition, two people are usually interested in getting to know each other, which means that a girl who longs for a serious relationship will definitely find some money herself for the first meeting. In addition, there are special sites on the network with frequent “legends”, names and photographs of scammers, which, if you suspect fraud, will not be out of place to study.

One rather enterprising British citizen entered into correspondence via the Internet with our unsuspecting ladies, turned their heads with compliments, invited them to meet and spend time in one of the Cypriot resorts. The ladies naturally agreed. They came to Cyprus, and there they were already waiting for them in a five-star hotel on the seashore, the hero-lover himself with a bouquet of flowers and a ring on his finger. Then there were delicious three days with gourmet food and expensive wine in the room. The ladies were thrilled and were not at all interested at whose expense the banquet was ... But in vain! Because everything, I repeat, everything was ordered in their name! At the appointed time, the tempter disappeared, leaving his lady to drink some exotic cocktail in a sun lounger on the seashore, where she was found by the hotel administrator, eager to present the bill for payment ...

Marriage swindlers

The scheme of their “work” is traditional: a darling guy with a hanging tongue becomes the favorite of a dating site, interests girls from a few heels, each of whom then bewitches in a personal ICQ, more and more “deserving” her trust. It comes to an invitation to come to visit the girl for a while, to get to know each other better. And nothing is alarming - after all, this is that charming young man, the soul of a dating site. You can definitely trust him one hundred percent. Meanwhile, the darling boy arranges an emergency tour of different cities, "traveling" from girl to girl. After each visit, the next "enchanted" loses money and valuables from the apartment. And the scammer himself, of course, does not appear on the dating site anymore.

You can meet a maniac not only on the streets of the city, but also on a dating site. A well-thought-out profile, a few attractive photos and it will not be difficult for him to organize an Internet acquaintance with a girl who attracts him.

It is often very difficult to recognize a criminal, he is cautious and in ordinary life is no different from a string of similar young people.

The danger that the guy you like may turn out to be a maniac should not be a reason for abandoning Internet dating or going on a first date. Thoughtful actions and precautions will help avoid dangerous situations and save you from trouble.

Safety rules (mainly for girls)

Register on trusted dating sites. Read preliminary reviews about the site on the Internet, see if the site has an official address and phone number, and a feedback form.

Under no circumstances should the home address appear on the Internet pages. Do not immediately give your phone number and address until you know the person better.

Carefully read the profiles (questionnaires) and look at the photos before giving someone your contacts. If something seems suspicious to you, then it is better to immediately stop communicating.

Check the identity of a man in all known ways. If the intentions of your interlocutor are pure, then he will never refuse to give you the address of his profile in some major social network.

Do not send money to anyone, and in general, there is no need for victims.

If we are talking about meeting a person from another city or country, and the man invites you to visit and promises to pay your expenses only upon arrival, then there is no need to take a loan, get into debt and pay back the last. After all, he may not keep his word, and even not meet you.

If a man is going to visit you, book him a hotel room. What if he turns out to be a psycho and ruins your or rented apartment? You will pay for the damage. And then, in a hotel, you don't have to cook breakfast for him if you don't like him.

Do not settle for a meeting in a quiet secluded place! A cafe or bar will be the perfect place for a first date after Internet dating.

Get to the meeting point on your own. Do not accept the tempting offer to pick you up by car. The same applies to the end of a date and the moment of farewell - getting into a car with a stranger young man can be dangerous.

End the first date before nightfall. One evening is enough to understand whether you want to continue a relationship with a person from the Internet.

Regular Users

For such users, dating sites have become a soft duvet with which you can cover yourself with your head, get away from everyday reality and problems. They have turned online dating into a routine, a habit, and no matter what they say, they are not ready to give up this game. Their goal is not sex, rather, the fact of conquering another girl (or boy) is important to them.

They are bogged down on dating sites like fishing nets. Having got once and finally entangled in them, such people are unlikely to be able to get out on their own, and even if they get out, the traces of such an adventure will remain in the psyche of the “web-fish man” for a long time.

But the most common type to watch out for at all costs are players. In fact, they are looking for nothing but entertainment. Sometimes their entertainment is very cruel and very hard to hurt. My friend once ran into this. They corresponded for a long time, were already going to meet in real life, and at one fine moment her chosen one told her that he had been diagnosed with cancer and he should go to the hospital for an operation. A month later, she receives a letter from his friend: her chosen one has died. And a year later, she meets him alive and well, all on the same site. I will not describe to you the state of mind of my friend, God forbid we go through this.

A similar case was discussed at one of the American forums, where, too, one American young lady suddenly fell ill and her virtual admirer died. The young lady was active, so she conducted her own independent investigation, the results of which shocked her - the failed "deceased" in reality was only 13 years old. This is the miracle of acceleration.

Psychological traps

The first trap is the ease and safety of creating new contacts.

Online "relationships" are extremely easy to start and very easy to end. There is no need to worry about how you look, what impression you make on others: others will see you only if you want it, and the way you want. There is a charming, captivating illusion of a full-fledged emotional life, devoid of those inevitable shortcomings and difficulties that real communication brings. What is the danger. The relationships we build in real life always require a lot of mental work to create and maintain them. Internet relationships require almost no emotional labor. Something went wrong? Just remove this contact from your list. Block the ability to send you messages, change your address mailbox, and start over. The ease of creating contacts disaccustoms investing in maintaining them. The result is numerous short and empty virtual relationships, the fear of creating real relationships, the desire to dull the feeling of loneliness with new and new virtual novels.

Trap two. The Internet gives you the opportunity to be yourself.

You are in real life - a boring accountant or a modest engineer - what's the difference? On the net, nothing will prevent you from shining with erudition (there are online encyclopedias at hand) and wit. You can pretend to be a bankrupt oligarch or a girl of easy virtue. You can try on yourself and play any role that you always wanted to play, but it was scary, ashamed, embarrassing. In the network, awkwardness and shame disappear as if by magic - and really, how can it be embarrassing in front of a soulless piece of iron? What is the danger. Psychologists use the concept of "self-identity" to describe the set of qualities that make a person the way he is. Network relationships often lead to the loss of "self-identity", they allow you to play "yourself or another", and there is a great risk of playing too much. There is a change of priorities: real life begins to seem like a boring preamble to the "real". Often hidden psychological problems persistently demanding compensation. A shy student online becomes a boorish cynic, and a modest housewife becomes an aggressive feminist, whose speech is replete with profanity.

Trap three. The peculiarity of network communication is such that the image of another person in Internet communication is completely devoid of reality.

We fill it with our own fantasies, hidden desires, unsatisfied needs, and readily believe that the person on the other side of the monitor is really like that. When communicating with their virtual interlocutor, people, of course, are sure that they are communicating with a person who suits them so well, understands them so well, always listens carefully, but in fact, communication takes place with oneself, people communicate with the image that they themselves came up with . At the same time, the content of the replicas coming from behind the other side of the screen does not matter, since everything said by the interlocutor will be attributed to a fictitious image and endowed with the corresponding meaning. What is the danger. It is extremely pleasant to live in a fantasy world for a while, but it is impossible to continue the illusion indefinitely. If the Internet still spared a part of the consciousness, then there will be a desire to meet with a virtual partner for real, and here it turns out that the ideal image created is hardly true, hence disappointment, and sometimes even depression. However, the most formidable danger lies in the fact that, carried away by the illusion, burning with the desire to maintain it as long as possible, people cut off the possibility of creating real, real relationships or interrupt existing ones. The Internet provides colossal opportunities for the development of a person's outlook, his information "feeding". On the other hand, it can be painfully fixated on it. Which often happens. Some go headlong into the illusory-virtual world, enthusiastically communicate with "cyber friends", with "cyber brides" and gradually begin to lose the line that separates the real, everyday life with electronic phantoms. Many say that the Internet develops communication skills, but given the monosyllabic nature of Internet replicas and the use of so-called emoticons, this is hard to believe. So with live contact, an Internet fan can forget what words and how to say, how to behave. Social detraining develops, and sometimes - savagery. In modern psychiatry, Internet psychoses and neuroses have not yet been studied in detail. Although not a very pleasant trend has emerged. People who are overly preoccupied and sometimes zombified by the Internet, as a rule, have a poorer life. People move little, are chained to the computer for hours, hypokinesia develops. They stop noticing the beauty of the surrounding world, lose the ability to have normal human relationships, which are replaced by surrogate, base animal instincts to satisfy desires and receive pleasure. Thus, Internet addiction often makes people morally maladapted, with a crippled psyche and no longer able to live in a human society that does not accept them. I would like to finish with a warning: behind the seemingly harmless and fashionable Internet addiction, do not overlook the beginning of a serious neurosis, some kind of borderline psychological syndrome that can ultimately lead to schizophrenia.

What features of behavior should be paid attention to in order to avoid problems?

1. Beware of men who are more loaded with business and work than the President of the country, so that he does not have time to meet with you even during his legal vacation. If a man is busy meeting friends, doing laundry, cooking, etc., then you can imagine what place he assigns to you in his life.

2. Beware of men who can't even be with you online on holidays and other significant dates for you: birthdays, Valentine's Day, or when you need ordinary emotional support. If he can't rethink his plans for the day and put you, at least occasionally, at the top of his list, you will always be last in his life.

3. Be attentive to what he says about himself, try not to miss any details. If the stories, data, and arguments to support it change every day, that's a warning sign for you. The same red flag is a vague answer to questions you clearly articulate.

4. Be especially attentive to stories designed to arouse sympathy in you, especially about the death of loved ones or loved ones, or unexplained serious illnesses. Remember, if a story sounds too fantastic to be true, then it's not true.

5. Beware of men who try to make you feel guilty about the questions you ask them in order to clarify the situation. If a man tries to accuse you of aggressive behavior in response to a remark you made, then it makes sense to recall the old saying about the best remedy protection.

6. Beware of men who use their children to justify not being able to meet you on his property. Usually they say that they don't want their children to get used to you before he is convinced of the seriousness and strength of your relationship. This concern may be quite justified in the first months of your communication, but if you have already met him several times on your territory, and he expresses a desire to come to you again and again, then it is quite obvious that the problem is not in his children, but in their father.

7. Beware of the so-called elusive men who always have their cell phones turned off, or who constantly doesn't call you back for long hours. We advise you to beware if he constantly claims that he did not receive your call or message, and constantly curses his operator for a disgusting connection.

8. If he doesn't show up online or write you back despite what he promised you, and more than that, he doesn't find an explanation that satisfies you, cross him off your contact list. If you forgive him for such a disrespectful attitude towards you at least once, be sure that he will repeat this many, many more times.

9. Beware of men whose mood towards you changes like a spring breeze. At first, he cannot talk enough with you, writes to you several times a day, then disappears for a week, or even two. Such behavior is only calculated to make you a victim of his whimsical and careless whims. Play by your own rules, live by your schedule.

10. Check your fan information. If you know where he works, look up his firm's website and check the information given on the website against the information he gave you. In general, try to make the most of the Internet and collect as much information as possible about your admirer before you are going to meet him in real life.

Women are often unaware of the danger a dating site poses for them. It would seem that such a harmless thing and registration is free!

However, practice shows that with the advent of such a service, the risk of girls "getting stuck in history" has increased many times over.

Why do you think? There are several reasons - let's look at them now. In addition to maniacs, drug addicts, alcoholics and mentally unhealthy people, whom you should be afraid of meeting a priori, keep the following in mind.

What should a woman be afraid of on a dating site

Alice's story (32 years old)

“The first time I registered on a dating site nine years ago. I even tried dating foreigners. One of them wrote that he was a descendant of aristocrats. I confess that I dreamed about it so much before that I immediately introduced myself with my future husband at a diplomatic reception among the local beau monde. Do you know how far from reality the image of the overseas prince turned out to be? But I, as if bewitched, continued to believe in a fairy tale and lived with him for 3 years!

And another gentleman said that he was a sniper in Yugoslavia and even a book was written about him! After 2 years, in a casual conversation with his father, it turned out that these were just painful fantasies and a desire to create a heroic image from almost nothing. How much time have I lost by believing these liars!”

In order not to get into an unpleasant situation, remember that out of 100 representatives of the stronger sex from such sites, only two or three men will suit you - such is the sad statistics. D about how to go on a date, be sure to get to know . Read each item carefully, pay attention to the details - perhaps it will save your life, or at least nervous system from shocks.

Today, there is nothing strange about dating on social networks and on dating sites, but it makes sense to follow safety rules so as not to become a victim of fraud or harassment. So what should you know about online dating?

Online dating rules

1. NET TICKET OR NET ETIKETTE

Be polite. Is always. Even if you don't like appearance For someone who wants to meet you, write at least something like "Thank you very much, but no." Active correspondence increases the popularity of your profile on dating sites. In addition, politeness and conciseness will not give a reason for a nervous, unlucky boyfriend to annoy you because of a refusal.

2. NEVER SHOW YOUR FULL NAME

You do not need to publish your full name, date of birth, address of residence in your profile. Limit yourself to the city. Fraudsters can use your data, and the most innocent is hacking into your mail or collecting money on your behalf from your friends.

3. ASK FOR A PHOTO OF THE SPEAKER

Fraudsters often use photos of actors or models. Check the resulting photo through a Google image search or on the Tineye website www.tineye.com. If someone else's photo was slipped to you, politely end the correspondence with this person, he is lying to you.

4. CORRESPOND VIA THE PRIVATE MESSAGE SERVICE ON A DATING SITE

Don't give out your email. Not to mention annoying letters, you can learn a lot about you from it. The dating service still assumes confidentiality, and you can always ban an annoying boyfriend or delete your profile. Work email is not.

5. DO NOT WAIT UNTIL YOU ARE KNOCKED IN PRIVATE - GO TO GET TO KNOW YOURSELF

Most dating sites raise their profiles of active users to the top of the rankings, which increases your chances.

Meet only in public places

The first date should be held where there are a lot of people, from where you can leave at will. Let your friends know where you went and who to meet, keep your phone on.

And remember, you don't have to make the decision to continue the relationship right after the first meeting. Take a break for a day or two to consider whether you really want to continue.