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Intimate life of the wife. Ways to diversify in sex: what can you do if you want? Sex life between husband and wife

Almost all couples sooner or later come to a state where intimate life becomes more boring and monotonous than it was at the beginning of the relationship. Passion fades, and the spouses believe that nothing can rekindle the flame between them.

Some families take this quite calmly, as a given that does not interfere with building happy relationship further, and some couples begin to panic, believing that now they will have to look for a new partner for sex, either within the family (love on the side), or get divorced altogether. In this article, we will consider the causes of the fading of passion, as well as ways to solve this problem.

Phases of love

At the very beginning of a romantic relationship, a woman and a man are absolutely immersed in each other. The passion between them boils and rages. Then, after some time, the relationship becomes more deep meaning, and intimate life becomes more familiar and routine. With the birth of children, family life moves to a new level.

New worries are added, and intimate life changes its rhythm and quality. Spouses are well aware of each other's desires, they can give pleasure to their partner. As a rule, both husband and wife are quite calm about new experiments and pauses in their sexual life.

When the children grow up, it would seem that there is time to remember about yourself, your desires and immerse yourself again in the sexual component of marriage, without being distracted by other problems. However, the spouses are faced with such a problem that the quality of their intimate relationships has noticeably decreased, and their emotions have significantly diminished.

What to do in this case? Is it possible to engage in an intimate life with a former passion or come to terms with the extinction of mutual attraction?

Three component concept of love

First you need to understand what passion is. The American psychologist R. Sternberg proposed a three-component concept of love. According to this concept, the main components of any relationship are intimacy, passion and devotion.

Intimacy is a person's need for intimacy, warmth, trusting relationships, the desire to share their innermost with someone.
Passion is that raging energy that pushes partners to each other, provokes them to get closer and have sex soon.
Devotion is the ability of partners to be faithful to each other, to protect their relationship from external circumstances, preventing them from collapsing.

When all three components are equally present in a relationship, this is love that is close to perfection. intimate life in this case, it does not fade over time. Crises of family life do not bypass such relationships, but they are easily overcome, bringing additional experience and further strengthening the marriage. Such ideal love happens in life, however, unfortunately, it is quite rare.

Love

The most common standard of relationships that most couples come to is love-friendship. In this model of relationships, components such as intimacy and devotion are fundamental, while passion fades into the background. This model is quite advantageous, since the extinction of passion is a normal, natural phenomenon. Much more important is trust, respect, devotion and willingness to share joys and sorrows with a partner until the end of their days.

It is in this format of relations that the couple has every chance to live a happy family life. When there is confidence in your feelings and the feelings of your partner, the desire to go through life hand in hand, when your goals and values in life coincide - is this not happiness?

Is it possible to engage in intimate life fully and efficiently in the format of love-friendship relationships? Of course, it is possible, but passion in such a relationship can either flare up with renewed vigor or decline at different periods of life, and these fluctuations do not prevent spouses from being happy in marriage.

Whatever models of relationship you are in with your partner, it never hurts to diversify your sexual experience. What are the ways to do this?

You can discuss the current situation with your other half and add romantic evenings to your family life schedule. They will tune you in a certain way, strengthening mutual attraction and bringing you closer to your partner.
You can sign up for erotic massage courses. Having mastered several interesting techniques, you can significantly expand the range of emotions received from having sex, which will undoubtedly affect your intimate life in the best possible way.
To make your partner look at you with new eyes, awakening dormant emotions, you can radically change your image. For example. you can lose weight, change your hairstyle, style of clothing, etc. All these actions, if they improve your appearance help you refresh your senses. However, you should not, for example, cut your hair short if your husband is crazy about your long curls, or lose weight to the point of exhaustion if your partner cannot stand skinny women.

Intimate life during menstruation

Many couples wonder if it is possible to live sexually during menstruation. Since in this article we are talking about passion, it is in a fit of it that partners sometimes have sexual intercourse during menstruation. What do gynecologists say about this? They warn of the possibility of getting an inflammatory process in female organs as a result of the ingress of pathogenic bacteria, as well as the risk of earning endometriosis. On the other hand, not everyone shares this view. It is impossible to answer this question unambiguously, everything is very individual here.

Thus, intimate life during menstruation is an undesirable phenomenon, but if you succumbed to passion, then do not reproach yourself, most likely nothing terrible will happen.

What should you strive for in a relationship?

Many men are wondering how to diversify their intimate life with their wife. And it is right. You should always strive for the best. Also, women ask themselves how to diversify their intimate life with their husband. When the desire is mutual, it means that everything will work out for you. It is worse when one partner is interested in this issue, while the other is already satisfied with everything. In a relationship, you need to strive for mutual understanding. If you learn to negotiate with each other, to meet your partner halfway, your relationship will be strong and reliable.

How to diversify intimate life? Couples who have gone through this stage in their lives advise the following:

Visit a sex shop together. There you can find many interesting devices that help diversify intimate relationships. For men who are interested in the question of how to diversify their intimate life with their wife, in a specialized store they will definitely pick up something interesting.
Role-playing games. Sometimes trying on various sexual images helps to diversify intimate life, for example, schoolgirls or nurses (for which partners have enough imagination).
Mastering exotic sexual techniques. In the age of the Internet, you can find any information that interests you, the main thing is to set such a goal.

Conclusion

The most important thing in family relationships is trust, respect and care. If partners listen to the desires and needs of each other, everything can be overcome, any crises in living together. You should always remember that the family is the most valuable thing, and you should not look for something on the side if some difficulties appear on the horizon. You need to overcome them together, and then family life, including intimate life, will always delight you.

Candid topics about sex life on video.
Here you will find very important videos about the intimate life of a person. You can watch every video for free. And you need to understand that everything that is in this category must be studied. Many people do not think about the seriousness of this information, although the consequences of ignorance can be serious.
Sexual intimate life - a category with video tips on our website will be very useful to you. Here you can learn a lot about how it all starts or how to behave in certain situations. Before starting a sexual life for a woman or a man, be sure to watch these videos, they are on our website for free.
Sex education is a necessary and useful thing, but until recently it was even unheard of in the vastness of our country. Parents had to independently tell their teenagers about the intricacies of sex. However, not having special theoretical knowledge and considering this topic "inconvenient", few people managed to make such a conversation really useful. The second option is the street, that is, grown-up boys and girls learn about the patterns of intimate attraction from their more intelligent peers.

Great luck that you can now watch online advice about sex life. They will be useful not only for boys and girls, but also for mature men and women who have been married for more than one year.

The piquancy of this topic forever closed access to its discussion in wide circles. It is generally not customary to talk about how best to make love and that there are any rules in this process from a moral point of view. But if you do not reduce this conversation to vulgarity and depravity, then everyone can learn for themselves something truly important and valuable.
For beginner mothers, there will be another category that is useful - there pregnant women will learn a lot of new things. And in our opinion, these two categories are similar, we hope the link is not in vain.
Returning to the description of the current category, it is worth noting that important tips about intimate life are given by specialists who have devoted their lives to studying the behavior of the body, bacteria, and so on in this direction. We do not just publish such videos here. On the Internet, qualified sex therapists have appeared discussing the problems that are urgent for each person.

For young people, free recommendations about sex from YouTube videos will be useful. Of these, young people preparing for the first sexual intercourse will be able to learn about such important aspects like contraception and choice of first partner. Interesting Facts about deprivation of virginity and vaginoplasty can be useful for girls. And guys can learn how to prevent premature ejaculation.

It is difficult for those who begin their sexual life to ask someone for advice; it is not customary for us to go to a sex therapist about this. Therefore, beginners have to gain experience on their own mistakes, which, alas, can become fatal.

There is no shame in knowing anything about sex. And The best way to do this is to review a selection of YouTube video lessons without registration. The administration of our site has tried to ensure that only really important and interesting videos that can teach something, and not corrupt, get into the collection.

Online viewing will allow you to listen to the advice of psychologists and, turning them into reality, diversify the sexual side of your life. You can watch YouTube video lessons about sex for beginners online for free. We have put together a large collection of tutorial videos for beginners who want to learn everything on their own.

“Sex is like a business, it needs to be constantly developed.” This quote from American actress Mae West is very true. It is especially worth remembering for men and women who have been married for a long time. When you share a bed with a person for years, then sex turns from euphoria into a habit or, even worse, into a duty. And this is a sure way to tension in relationships, constant quarrels and even divorce.

To prevent this from happening, regularly add new bright notes to your intimate life. Every woman strives to diversify sex with her husband, so a man does not need to sit idle. You can use the tips below as a source of inspiration or as a to-do list - most importantly, take action!

Do you want to diversify sex with your wife? It doesn't have to be fancy, there are simple, useful ways.

Sex with a girl began to acquire mechanical features, to acquire numerous rituals? Sexual intercourse happens at the same time, in the same place? You can arrange a shake-up by adding surprise. Just lash out (in good sense words) to your spouse right in the hallway or, for example, not at the usual evening time, but before going out into the street when you are going for a walk. In addition, we advise you to take a closer look at your apartment - there are probably places in it where you have never had sex. Dare! Suddenness and surprise keywords in order to add a small storm to intimacy.

Without consulting with your spouse, take a couple of photos that will surely turn both of you on. Take your family to the beach or picnics in the summer, go to the country house and spend long winter evenings by the fireplace. Change the place, duration and position more often when having sexual intercourse. Sexual life does not tolerate everyday life! Spouses need to experiment, and the more often, the better. You can live together, enjoying every day! Be a real man by turning your wife on with just a glance.

Watching adult movies

Arrange a joint home movie show from a variety of films for adults. Watching erotic films is usually perceived by women as courtship, as an attempt to convey erotic signals to them. From view beautiful film erotic content appears psychological emancipation. Only advice: if you and your wife have not watched “adult” films before, then start with soft erotica. If the first joint such film is too tough, then most likely it will be very awkward for both of you.

Home video

You can achieve diversity by filming everything on video or taking a couple of photos. This will excite any partner and add spice to the relationship. Alternate positions and capture everything on camera. Use special "toys" and watch your partner's reaction. Surely you will be able to determine what she likes more.

Home photos and videos will help diversify sex after 50. Paired with experience, this method is simply irreplaceable. Remember the past, think about your partner and do exactly what she wants. After fifty, this will help you maintain potency. Even advanced age is not a hindrance for those who approach sexual fantasies wisely.

Trying adult games

Now there are a lot of games for adults in stores - various cards with tasks, cubes with poses on the sides, etc. You can just take pieces of paper and write various sexual desires with your wife (anything - favorite or not yet explored poses, fantasies, various places for sex, clothing, role-playing games). Once a week, pull out a new piece of paper and bring the received task to life.

"Unusual snack"

Couples love experimenting with products. In Japan, there are whole rituals on this topic. The girl is “served”, and the man, with his lips, without hands, eats food from her body. A kind of foreplay is a lot of fun!

Strawberries with cream, ice or honey help to diversify oral sex. Everyone has their own preferences! Try something new, and you will surely be able to not only diversify relationships in bed, but also surprise your girlfriend or wife.

Let's go shopping

Sex shops offer a lot of interesting products for sexual partners who want to diversify sex. Are you shy? There is nothing easier than anonymously ordering goods in an online store. Today, there are a lot of things on sale that help diversify the intimate life of lovers, make their sex unusual, and improve quality. Start small - for example, try a variety of lubricants, find the most suitable one for your couple (lubes are classic, cooling, warming, for oral sex, anal, etc.). Then try using different outfits and toys from the sex shop. In general, turn on your imagination, be bolder.

Exploring new

A sure way to diversify sex is to try new positions, unknown foreplay techniques, methods of performing oral sex, etc. Today there is no shortage of information, you can easily find the right article on the Internet. You can use the good old Kama Sutra. Just do not start with complex experiments, evaluate your physical capabilities. And, of course, let your wife know that you want to try something new in sex. If she does not like your impulse to oral or other experiments, then this will not kindle the fire of relationships, but, on the contrary, will put it out.

The new environment also allows you to get variety in sex. Change your usual place and try to have sex:

On the balcony. Make sure that no one sees your couple, otherwise there are risks of becoming famous person on YouTube. In cold weather, experimenting in this way is also not worth it.
In the shower. You can diversify sex by taking together water procedures. Even if you are not the happy owner of an expensive shower cabin, this method works! In the bathroom, you will be amazed by the flexibility of your bodies and the discovery of many new positions that will be forced in a limited space.
In the kitchen. You can diversify your sex life while cooking dinner. Pleasure lies not only in spontaneity. In any case, no one has canceled whipped cream and ice cubes.
On the stairwell. Let's go back to the very beginning of sexual adventures - in school years! Adrenaline aggravates the senses, you never know, suddenly a neighbor gets into his head to go up without an elevator, and he will see you ...
Not at home. On inviting summer evenings, it is better to get out of the four walls and walk through the secluded corners of the city. You do not even suspect how many tempting places you can find in order to retire! Just do not covet various institutions and public places, because this is no longer a variety of personal life, but a real crime.

Please note that this method is effective only for young people. In old age, few people will like this. Women are more circumspect than men, so if your partner is against this kind of variety, then don't insist.

Buying a new bed

Researchers from the Department of Family Sociology at the University of Cologne conducted an experiment: cameras were installed in the rooms of volunteers. As a result, it was found that couples with a wider bed had sex more often, foreplay was more varied (including massage and oral sex), and the sex itself turned out to be longer. It was also found that couples who had recently made repairs and updated furniture were more passionate and ready for sexual experiments.

The conclusion is obvious: even such a simple thing as new interior in the bedroom and the purchase of a king bed. If you have been living in an apartment for a long time and have not changed anything in the interior, then it's time to act!

We are looking for a treasured point

The G-spot is like the Philosopher's Stone. Everyone knows about him, but few believe in his existence, because they have not encountered him in real life. However, the G-spot is very real, and it's easy to find if you want - there are a lot of diagrams and descriptions of the location of this treasured corner of the female body on the Internet. After the opening of the point takes place, we recommend that you do more global research and map your girlfriend. More precisely - a map of her erogenous zones. Traditional sensitive areas are:

Lips.
Earlobes.
Breast.
The area from the navel to the pubis.
Clitoris, G-spot.
Feet.
Buttocks.
Popliteal dimple.

The listed intimate areas can be caressed with hands, tongue, used foreign objects(feather, piece of ice, warm wax). The main thing is to follow the reaction of the spouse - she will tell you what she likes more and what does not seem pleasant. After the body of the spouse has been examined, you can ask the wife to map your body, which can be no less exciting. The difference is that guys have less sensitivity of nerve endings.

massage session

Arrange an erotic massage session. Its purpose is to excite the partner, to create favorable conditions for sensual sex, to ensure the most powerful orgasm. The most suitable areas for erotic massage for a man are the back, torso, buttocks, lower leg. Many men enjoy head massage.

With female erotic massage, it is worth focusing on the back, palms, chest, and feet. The genitals can be used, however, it will no longer be a massage, but a prelude. Erotic massage without affecting the genitals can be achieved if: the massage therapist is naked; touching of bodies against each other is used; light touches or oral caresses with the tongue are used. Various oils and incense can be used to help enhance the sensations.

Discuss feelings, desires and fantasies

Talk to each other more about sex. Try the power of phrases about sexual desire: if you let your partner know how much you want him, the response will not keep you waiting. Memories of favorite erotic moments from the joint past, stories about sexual fantasies and dreams help to tune in the right way. To implement them or not - decide for yourself, but even one conversation about them is effective way to achieve intense excitement.

Blitz tips:

Do not neglect sex in family life. Let carnal pleasures become an integral part of the relationship. Develop skills, gain experience and have fun.
Improvise! In order to diversify your sex life, you don't need a lot of mind. Do not give up toys and "family" photos.
Study your partner's body. You will always find something new for yourself, even if you have lived together for many years! This will help you maintain harmony in relationships and forget about jealousy.
Marriage sex with a loved one can be turned into an unforgettable pleasure. Do whatever you wanted before, but only after the consent of your partner.
There are many positions in sex - try them all! Come up with something of your own.

We are sure that these tips are not an unexpected surprise for you. Everyone knows about them, but not everyone uses them. And in vain - they are very simple and effective. Move from theory to practice, experiment, get new impressions of sex, and you simply won’t have time for such stupid things as jealousy and quarrels!

From the point of view of Islam, the intimate life of spouses and the mutual satisfaction of physiological needs are a natural phenomenon inherent in man by nature. The first wedding night It is considered a good deed on the wedding night for the groom to offer the bride sweets (honey), permitted drinks (milk), spices and treat her to them. It is a Sunnah before entering into an intimate connection to her husband to put his hand on his wife’s forehead and pronounce the following prayer: asons: the belief gard ughter وiform الله du لail.Ruٍ ← ماحاحاحاحاحاحاحاحاح bullyh, Barakalllah Likulin Mina Fi Sahibi. "). It is also reported that the Prophet (peace be upon him) and read this prayer: اللهم إني أسألك من خيرها وخيرما جبلتها عليه وأعوذ بك من شرها وشرما جبلتها عليه «Allahumma Inni asalyuka minutes hayriha wa ma Khairy dzhabaltaha alyayhi, vaa'uzubika minutes sharriha vasharri ma jabaltaha alaihi” (“O Allah, I ask You for everything good from her and good from her offspring. I also seek protection from You from her evil and the evil of her offspring!”) (al-Bukhari and Abu Dawud). A charitable deed on the wedding night is the performance of the Sunnah prayer by the spouses in two rak'ahs and the reading of the following prayer: الل feathّ inspectious اج space وrating inct ما جimes بicles وخail.Ru وipeulta lf °oul إail.Ruا إυرairs إmpى خicles خimesa Barikli Fi Ahly va Bariklyahum Phiahum. Allahummajma baynana ma jamaata bihairin, wafarrik baynana from farrakta ila khayrin "(" O Allah, bless me in relations with my wife (husband) and her (his) in relations with me. O Allah, establish good between us and separate us in separation kindly!") (Abu Shayba). Immediately before rapprochement, it is always advisable to read the following prayer: asons: ، الل feathّ etheres جimes الشيbed (“In the name of Allah, I begin. O Allah, delivered Satan from us and delivered Satan from the child that You will give us!”). And if conception occurs later, then Satan will not be able to harm the child (al-Bukhari). Imam al-Ghazali (may Allah sanctify his soul!) Wrote that at the time of ejaculation is recommended to silently read the following prayer: الحمد لله الذي خلق من الماء بشرا فجعله نسبا وصهرا وكان ربك قديرا «Alhamdulillyahi llyazi halyaka minals Mai Basharan, fadzha'alyahu nasaban vasyhra, wakana rabbuka qadir” (“Praise be to Allah, who created man from a drop of water and made him offspring and kinship. your Lord is the Almighty." It should be noted that the spouses on their wedding night need to pay great attention to each other so that the sexual relationship between them takes place in a natural way, and they receive mutual satisfaction. To do this, you must follow the following recommendations: 1. The husband should not rush in the process of defloration of his wife. To overcome her embarrassment, he should start slowly and gently. A husband should talk to his wife, joke, caress, kiss her. In a word, he should achieve reciprocity. After all, the stronger the excitement, the stronger the health of the unborn child. In addition, it will have a beneficial effect on the body of the spouses themselves. According to Islamic marital etiquette, the husband must always create such a prelude to intimacy through words, kisses and love games. 2. A spouse should not be insensitive, cold. Pushing the husband away leads to bad consequences. 3. The husband should not be afraid of something or be afraid to approach his wife and get close to her, because she wants to see him confident and ready to meet her that night. The fear or embarrassment of the husband will further embarrass the wife. 4. Spouses need to help each other in the process of rapprochement and complete it without negative emotions. 5. If the spouses failed to get close on their wedding night, then this is not at all considered weakness and impotence, and one should not make a tragedy out of this. In some cases, it is even approved. Perhaps one of the spouses was shy or worried, which could interfere with the process of rapprochement. The young will still have a lot of time to get to know and get used to each other. It is customary for some peoples who profess Islam to demonstrate the consequences of sexual intimacy to the relatives and friends of the husband after the wedding night. This process is a remnant of local customs and has nothing to do with Islam, and moreover, is prohibited by Sharia. Ethics of intimate relations First of all, it should be noted that after each sexual approach, you need to wash the genitals. One of the scientists said that if a man does not wash himself after getting close to his wife and as a result of this he will have stones (i.e. stones in the organs), then let him blame only himself. If the spouses repeat sexual intercourse, then it is advisable for them to perform at least a small ablution, as before prayer. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “If one of you wants to repeat sexual intercourse, then it is better for him to perform a small ablution between two approaches” (Muslim, Abu Dawud). According to the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him!) ablution before sexual intercourse increases sexual activity . But it would be even better for the spouses to swim after each sexual intercourse, as this can also affect the health of the unborn child. If the spouses, whose full ablution was violated in the process of intimate relationships, want to eat or sleep, then they perform at least a small ablution. It should be noted that eating without a full bath is an undesirable act. Performing a small wudu after breaking a large one is considered optional, but it is an imperative Sunnah. God-fearing people in this case commit it. The most appropriate is bathing before bedtime. On this occasion, the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him!) said: “You can sleep, and if you wish, you can perform a small ablution” (Muslim, al-Bukhari). And in another legend it says: “After you perform a small ablution, you can sleep, but do not forget about the upcoming full ablution” (al-Bayhaqi, Muslim). According to legend, the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him!) sometimes performed a small bath before going to bed, and sometimes bathed. But it should be noted that even if a small ablution was performed at night, bathing in the morning is still obligatory. There are obligatory and recommended actions of a full ritual ablution. Let's try to explain them. Obligatory actions of ritual bathing are: 1. Intention (niyat): when bathing, it is done mentally. It is desirable to pronounce it aloud. The intention is made when the water touches the body: "I intend to perform the obligatory ritual bathing, in the name of Allah." 2. Removal from the body of various substances that prevent contact of water with the body, such as glue, varnish, paint, resin, dough, dirt under the nails, etc. 3. Thorough body wash. When bathing, water must necessarily wash all parts of the body, including the bases of the hair, the navel, folds, etc. If the intention is missed or some part of the body is washed without it, it is necessary to start bathing again, together with the intention. Recommended actions of ritual bathing: 1. Before bathing, it is recommended to wash your hands three times. 2. If impurities remain on the body, especially on the genitals, it is advisable to wash them off. 3. Before bathing, it is advisable to perform a small ritual ablution. After performing ablution, the genitals can no longer be touched with the palm of the hand, otherwise, small ablution will be violated. 4. After ritual bathing, it is recommended to douse yourself three times, starting from the head. Wash the right side of the body first, then the left. 5. When bathing, it is good to turn towards the Kaaba (i.e. qibla). Obligatory bathing must be performed under the following circumstances: 1. After intercourse, regardless of whether there was a discharge or not. 2. Women after the completion of menstruation and birth cleansing. 3. With wet dreams (i.e. when ejaculation occurs in a dream). 4. When semen is released. Bathing should be avoided cold water immediately after sexual intercourse. Here we want to note that a man can refrain from ejaculation in the vagina with the consent of both spouses. However, it is more expedient not to do this, as this negatively affects the replenishment of the Muslim community. And its replenishment is one of the goals of marriage. Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Marry fertile women so that I feel pride in front of other prophets of your numbers.” The tradition also states that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “You can ejaculate aside, only everyone who should be created before the Day of Judgment will still be created.” Another reason for not wanting this is that a man who ejaculates outside of the vagina can leave a woman unsatisfied. A husband can get close to his wife using various positions and techniques without restriction, but with one known condition - to exclude anal intercourse. Allah Almighty said in the Qur'an: The meaning of the verse can be conveyed as follows: “Your wives are a field for you, where you grow the crops of your offspring. Walk on your field as you wish: using a standing posture, sitting, lying down, on your side, behind ”(2; 223. Tafsir al-Jalalayn). This verse was sent down to refute the lies of the Jews, who claimed that a child is born oblique if a man performs sexual intercourse by approaching his wife from behind. Thus, sexual contact can occur in any positions, but only in a natural way. As the Muslim jurists say, at three nights of the month lunar calendar it is undesirable to copulate: on the first night of the month, on the night in the middle of the month, on the last night. The companions of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him!) also spoke about the undesirability of this, ‘Ali, Mu’awiya, Abu Hurairah (may Allah be pleased with them!). Scholars note that Satan is present during the encounter on these nights, and that the devils copulate at the same time. Some scholars note the preference for copulation on Friday night and Friday afternoon, considering this the most favorable time. After the completion of sexual intercourse, spouses are not recommended to get up, it would be good to lie on their right side for a while, which will have a beneficial effect on their health. A man can have sexual relations with a pregnant wife whenever he wants and until she gives birth, if there are no diseases such as amniotic fluid discharge, etc., in which the doctor forbade intimacy. Pregnancy is not an obstacle to copulation, which is also confirmed by modern scientific research. However, a man should pay more attention to his wife and treat her very carefully. It is especially necessary to be careful in the first and last months of pregnancy. He must choose a position for intercourse that would provide the woman with peace and rest and would not harm the fetus. A spouse should not put his wife in a difficult, uncomfortable position, especially in the last months of pregnancy, since her burden is already heavy, and she can get tired very quickly. If there is a desire to have a child or, conversely, for some reason, pregnancy is undesirable, then the following recommendations can be followed, based on the physiological characteristics of the woman's body. Most women have a menstrual cycle of about 7 days (section I). Scientists say that for such women, the days from the 13th to the 16th inclusive, counting from the onset of menstruation (section III), are the days during which the probability of becoming pregnant is high. From the 8th to the 12th day inclusive from the beginning of menstruation (section II), as well as the last two weeks before the start of the next menstrual cycle(section IV) are the safest days for those who do not want to conceive. At the same time, it must be borne in mind that on days from the 10th to the 12th inclusive (IIa) and from the 17th to the 20th inclusive (IVa), the probability of becoming pregnant is still sufficient. For any woman, regardless of the duration of menstruation, the beginning of the tuhra period (the time when a woman is clean), i.e. the days following immediately after the end of menstruation, and the end of tuhra, i.e. last days before the start of the next period are the days with the least chance of getting pregnant1. Sharia prohibitions in intimate life First of all, we want to note that the husband is allowed to look at the whole body of his wife without restriction, but it is indecent to look at each other's genitals. This is also stated in the hadith narrated from Aisha: “The Messenger of Allah died. He did not see my organs, and I did not see his organs.” (Ahmad) It is desirable that the spouses cover themselves during the rapprochement with something. Scientists say that the degree of shame in the unborn child largely depends on this. During sexual intercourse, it is important that no one is in the room, even Small child . The genitals of the spouses must be covered from everyone. Spouses are not recommended to talk directly during intercourse, as scientists note the danger that the child may be born dumb. Spouses are forbidden to tell anyone about their intimate life and reveal its secrets. In order to strengthen good relations and in order to achieve the pleasure of Allah, respect and love from others, they should try to strictly keep family secrets and everything that they trust each other. It is indecent to reveal the secrets of marital relations, neither during the period of ‘iddah, nor after a divorce. A godly man wanted to divorce his wife. He was asked about the reason for the divorce, to which he replied that a reasonable person would never reveal family secrets. Some time after he divorced, he was again asked about the reasons for the divorce. The ex-husband replied that she was already a strange woman for him, and that he did not care about her and the past life together. This is how pure and beautiful relations between spouses, even between former ones, should be. A husband is forbidden to have anal sex with his wife. This is evidenced by the following hadiths: “Allah on the Day of Judgment does not look at the one who has committed anal intercourse with his wife” (Ahmad, Abu Dawud), “Cursed be the one who performs anal intercourse with his wife” (Ibn Maja, Ahmad). Anal intercourse is unnatural, perverse and destructive to the health and soul of a person, it also leads to impotence. Sharia prohibits sexual intercourse during the menstrual cycle and postpartum cleansing. Also, a man is not allowed to touch and enjoy what is between the navel and knees of his wife during the days of menstruation. The wife, in turn, is forbidden to allow her husband to touch these places, even if he wants to, or to touch her husband herself with these parts of the body. There is a verse in the Qur'an on this subject: The meaning of this verse can be conveyed as follows: “They ask you (O Muhammad!) About menstruation and the possibility of sexual intercourse with wives during this period. Tell them it's a time of trouble for women. Move away from them and do not touch them until their bleeding has passed and they are cleansed ”(2; 222. Tafsir al-Jalalayn). If, nevertheless, the husband touched these parts, then he must repent. And if the spouse during this period, by mistake or through forgetfulness, committed sexual intercourse, then he also needs to pay a ransom (kaffara) for what he did, giving it to those in need. If the discharge was red, then you need to pay one dinar, and if it was yellow, then half a dinar. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) commanded us this way, but this is not an obligation, but a recommended action. In addition, medicine has proven that relationships during menstruation lead to various diseases, and a woman even to infertility. Scientists say that it is possible to conceive a child with leprosy if the husband has sexual intercourse with his wife during menstruation, until she bathes after cleansing. At the same time, a man is allowed to be with his menstruating wife and do everything else, except for the above items. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said about this: “Do whatever you want, except for sexual intercourse” (Muslim, at-Tabarani). After the woman is freed from the menstrual cycle, she must wash herself, then perform a full ablution, after which intimate relationships are allowed according to Sharia. The benefits of moderate sexual intimacy and the harm from their abuse In the intimate life of spouses great importance has regular intercourse. Too long abstinence, as well as frequent and irregular contacts, lead to significant disturbances throughout the body and especially the functions of the genital organs. With regular sexual intercourse, thoughts that overcome a person go away, he gains vigor, calms down, his excessive anger is suppressed. In addition, as scientists note, it helps with melancholy and many neuropsychological diseases, giving vigor and expelling the “heaviness” accumulated due to the seed from the brain and heart. It also helps with kidney disease. Long-term abstinence from sexual intercourse, as well as their excessive frequency and disorder, due to the peculiarities of the anatomical structure of the male genital organs, leads to dysfunction of the urinary system (kidneys, bladder). Sometimes in men, due to a long cessation of copulation, there is an accumulation of semen, a decrease in sperm activity and a decrease in the ability to fertilize. Of course, with frequent and irregular contacts, there is a violation of the rhythm of sperm production, which leads to dysfunction of the genital organs. Frequent copulations in summer and autumn are more harmful than in winter and spring. According to scientists, as far as possible, it is best to refrain from frequent sexual intercourse for someone who suffers from diseases of the respiratory system, the cardiovascular system. For a man, the way of intercourse, when the woman lies on top, is harmful, as is standing intercourse, which weakens the body. Feeling the need to excrete feces or urine, as well as immediately after exercise, exertion, strong emotional experiences, one should not have sexual contact. Favorable time for rapprochement of spouses You should not approach each other on a full stomach, since after a meal there is a physiological redistribution of blood in the body, i.e. its large accumulation in the vessels of the intestine, and, accordingly, the blood supply to other organs decreases. Intercourse on a full stomach is a big exercise stress, which, with an existing blood deficiency, can lead to an attack of angina pectoris or fainting. You should also not get close after the complete and comprehensive digestion of food, because this is also harmful and difficult for the human body. For some, the auspicious state for approaching is at the beginning of the night, and this is the most suitable time for them, both for the reasons mentioned above, and because this is followed by a long sleep, and strength is restored again, and in women during sleep semen is retained. in the uterus. One should copulate only with healthy lust, which is not caused by a look, thoughts, itching or burning, but only by an abundance of semen and an overflow of the sexual organ, i.e. human physiology. All this contributes to a healthy state. male power. The best time for balanced people, this is when a person, having copulated, after a certain period of abstinence, feels satisfied, and all his feelings are aggravated. Many Muslim scholars believe that a husband needs to have sexual intercourse with his wife every four days. However, the needs of the wife must also be taken into account, since from the point of view of Islam, spouses have the same rights to sexual intimacy. Author Muhammad Hajiyev al-Inchi

The intimate life of a wife differs significantly from that of a man, and this is where the source of family problems for most couples most often lies. Sexual life is one of the main aspects of a relationship, and it needs to be given no less attention than other aspects of living together.

Sex is important.
The female orgasm is an achievable goal.

Sex is important

It would seem that in modern society the veracity of this statement is beyond doubt. But for some reason, this is not the case in family life. Experiencing love during courtship, couples experience feelings of delight, joy, there are usually no problems in sex, or they are attributed to nervousness, stress and shyness.

In marriage, this approach begins to creep out sideways. What the couple neglected in the candy-bouquet period comes out: somewhere the wife lied about her addictions in order to please her husband, somewhere the husband was careless about intimate caresses. On top of that, fatigue, stress at work, new responsibilities associated with the emergence of a family, problems do not allow a woman to relax and enjoy normally. And it turns out a situation where a man and a woman move away from each other. She doesn't like sex, she doesn't enjoy it, and he feels chilled and gets angry at best, and at worst goes into a binge.

And all because none of them started a frank conversation and did not want to pay attention to their partner.

The intimate life of a wife is not like the intimate life of a husband. Men, because of their physiology, perceive sex and experience orgasms differently. Conditions are not important to them, long caresses are not necessary. Physiologically, it's just a burst of excitement followed by an orgasm. The stronger sex usually prefers active and fast movements in sex, and foreplay is not required at all. Men don't have orgasms all the time, but they do happen regularly.

For women, for pleasure, a combination of many factors, both internal and external, is important. On the one hand, she should be calm, tuned in to sex, nothing should worry her (neither dirty dishes, nor problems at work or with children), she needs to be confident in her man. On the other hand, women need more time to get pleasure, so sex of 2-3 minutes will not bring even elementary pleasant sensations. Distractions are also children or adults who can suddenly enter the room, fear of getting pregnant, pain (especially as a result of sudden movements of the husband during sex).

Of the two partners, it is much more difficult for a woman to achieve orgasm. If the wife's intimate life is constantly going according to the "male scenario", she does not experience an orgasm at all. Therefore, she becomes cold, aloof, often perceives sex as a duty and can even avoid it under various pretexts.

The female orgasm is an achievable goal

It would seem that the requirements of men and women regarding sex are diametrically opposed. However, a compromise can be found.

First, the husband must understand what exactly matters to the wife. Most women need a quiet home environment, as well as foreplay for at least 10 minutes. During this time, she will relax and begin to enjoy. The movements of a man during sex should not be fast and sharp, at least at first, he needs to pay attention all the time and give caresses to his wife.

Secondly, the couple needs to find those poses and caresses that will fully satisfy both partners. A woman needs to be frank about her preferences and not be afraid to give enough caresses to her partner.

Yes, if a husband wants his wife to have an orgasm on a regular basis, he needs to show attention, endurance and care for his partner. Yes, it will take some effort. But the reward compensates for all the concessions: both will get the most out of intimate life.